Thoughts on premarital sex

(Or sex in general.. with a little section on virginity)

Being from an Asian community, sex is and has always been somewhat of a taboo issue around me. So its pretty easy to assume that premarital sex is regarded as something extremely wrong to do for the community I am in.

However, I am totally indifferent about the issue. I actually wanted to say that I am totally supportive of premarital sex, but I don't want to sound like I'm recommending it to every single couple out there.. its more like I don't think its a wrong thing to do, and it is especially, definitely not something sinful and humiliating.

One of the main things people have against premarital sex is due to all the risks and accidents relating to it. Ask anyone against premarital sex why and they'll point you to all the rising instances of baby dumping and sexually transmitted diseases. The thing is, all these negative things occur not because premarital sex is negative but because the people doing it are not well prepared, uninformed, or just reckless and irresponsible to begin with. Don't blame the sin, blame the sinner.

Speaking of sin, there is a lot of religious stigma against premarital sex. The main argument is that premarital sex is basically giving into the temptations of the flesh, suggesting couples to wait until marriage before going that far. Sex for 'recreational' purposes (for lack of a better term.. I don't like using casual sex because of all the baggage associated with it. Married couples have sex for recreational purposes too) is considered as sinful, as sex has the only purpose as the means to conceive a child and continue the bloodline~

I think this is a load of bullshit. The desire to have sex is one of the most natural things to feel for humans - it's hardwired into our brains, into our very being. Its an evolutionary necessity. Only the human mind, in all it's creativity, has come up with the idea of suppressing these natural instincts. Why? For moral reasons? In order to ensure a functional and orderly society? No. It is to claim ownership.

One might argue that patience is a virtue, and going fucking around isn't a civil thing to do. That's because these rules that have been placed in human societies have become universal rules, common sense, moral values, logic. I'm not saying that they are wrong, as I have often pointed out in my blogposts, as long as the mass majority of humans agree on a certain truth, it becomes the truth. At least until someone disputes it and persuades the mass majority. Everyone used to think the world was flat, until someone proved otherwise.

What I'm saying  is that these rules, these facts and absolute truths are not set in stone. They are created by humans for the betterment of human society, long long ago, and though they are effective working models of an orderly society, I think that most of these ideals are outdated. I'm not saying we should all throw caution to the wind and go sleeping around with whomever we wish.

I'm saying that nobody should worry about what other people think or be pressured by the rules of their societies and just do whatever they want, as long as both parties are fine with it and whatever they do does not effect other people.

Another thing I'd like to add is my thoughts on the concept of virginity. Most of you would be able to predict by now that my stance on the concept of virginity is that it is a "load of bullshit" XD Yes, exactly like what I mentioned earlier, virginity is also a concept created by humans long long ago. Let me tell you my warped theory on the conception of 'virginity'.

Long long ago, when human society was still very very male dominant, women were treated as possessions. The concept of virginity was introduced by men as a standard to measure their potential wives. The criterion for a virgin was that she must be young, fresh, and 'untouched' by any man. Sounds a lot like the criteria for picking fresh fruits in a marketplace. All men wanted virgins, and those who weren't virgins are cast aside as unwanted women with no future. This was possible because the men had all the power in most societies, so in order to survive, the women were forced to adapt to the standards set by men because a lone woman could not survive (comfortably) in such societies.

And so, this concept of virginity quickly catapulted in importance because it was a reliable and applicable standard throughout almost entire human civilizations. Mothers groomed daughters in order to meet this standards so that they would live good lives. Mothers. Women enforcing men's rules on their fellow women while men sit back and enjoy fruits of their labor. It sounds almost ridiculous when I put it that way, but that is what has been happening for centuries and has only begun to change during these recent centuries. A lot of feminists demonize men, but what they do not realize is that it is not just the patriarchal men, but the patriarchal way of thinking that is the enemy, and that includes women who think that way as well.

The concept of virginity also ensured the 'ownership' of a woman, as another man would be less likely to find another man's wife to be appealing because she isn't a virgin anymore. Of course this didn't really work, but its important to point out this idea of  'ownership' as another reason that solidifies this theory :P

Long story short, virginity is an extremely sexist concept to me which is horribly outdated. I cringe every time I hear people putting even a shred of consideration on virginity or preserving their 'sexual purity' v_v But hey, this is just my warped opinion. Don't feel pressured to change the way you think :P I'm not out to shake the foundations of human society, no matter how ridiculous and outdated it might seem to me. I'm just not going to sit still and adhere by it. Everyone has the freedom to chose whatever it is they want to do, so like Nike says, Just Do It~ tm ^o^b

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The dragons of my world

Like most fantasy writers, I was, and, to a certain extent, still am, enamored by dragons. I also think that there are one too many commas in the last sentence. Anyways.

Dragons are such amazing creatures with a rich collection of mythology and history associated with them. There is such a variety of different types of dragons from so many different cultures that its almost impossible to believe that they aren't real (search Wikipedia, my recent adventure wasted 3 hours of my life and made me save like forty Wikipedia pages which I guarantee I won't read anytime soon..)

Of course, with such a huge variety of different archetypes of dragons, there are bound to be some that I like and I dislike, and that's what I wanna talk about today ^o^

The Hopeless Romantic

The hopeless romantic is a young boy that grew up being enamored by love songs and ultra-sweet romantic scenes from movies and other sources of stories like comics, novels, etc. In other words, hopeless romantics grew up with the ambition of being an honorable boyfriend to a beautiful/sweet/cute girlfriend and while their friends focused on being number one in class, the best on the football team, or Pokemon Masters, they tried to mould themselves into the perfect boyfriend.

A few burnt pots and pans, the discovery of microwaveable foods and the washing machine, and an extreme makeover later, and you have an above-average-looking guy that is able to socialize with girls without the massive stuttering, blushing, or tendency to say unnecessarily inappropriate things that their other peers might suffer.

In other words, hopeless romantics are just average sociable guys that aren't female-repellent jerks.

The problem that plagues hopeless romantics and often gets them misunderstood is that they view most girls that they are (even mildly) attracted to as a potential girlfriend. While this might make them sound like jerks who are only out to get into your skirt and are not worth being friends with, lets not be judgmental.

To understand the workings of a hopeless romantic's mind is to first understand his motivations. And no, its not to get into your pants >:| Hopeless romantics are so obsessed with the desire to have a sweet and heartwarming relationship (as advertised on TV) that I can tell you that most of their focus towards the girls they are attracted to is to get together with them ..and ends there. The hurdle of getting into a relationship with a girl so difficult (provided he isn't blessed with astonishingly good looks) that what happens later is rarely considered - no reason to get his hopes up, right?

There is a very popular joke of a young boy that tries his best to impress the girls that he likes but fails all the time, until one day, he finally meets a girl that can accept him and becomes his girlfriend. His response to this was "Wow. SWEET *O* ....now what? :D"

And that, is the sad part of most relationships regarding young hopeless romantics. They don't know what to do :( and as many a hopeless romantic would discover, reality almost never turns out like what is shown on TV or written in books. Most become disappointed when their dreams become crushed after encountering their first major argument in their relationship, while a small, dangerous few try to replicate fairytale romances and end up scaring their girlfriends because they either move too fast (everything in movies are accelerated twentyfold to keep the story from being too stagnant like a documentary) are too dramatic, or have too high expectations.

In time, (and with perhaps many a heartbreak) most hopeless romantics will grow out of the phase of chasing a fairytale romance, which is often not very practical in today's cruel world. Some will continue pursuing romance, though in a more mature and sophisticated way, and by sheer force of probability, will end up happily with a girl (or guy) ^o^ Some, will become bitter and distance themselves from anything lovey-dovey :( that is, until they find someone that manages to 'heal their wounds' and revitalize them *o*

But a select few hopeless romantics will stay the way they are and (again, by sheer force of probability) might actually meet a girl (or guy) that's also a hopeless romantic (yes, for god's sake, this archetype, like all other archetypes, applies to all genders v_v) - and the stuff that can only be see in movies will magically appear in real life *o* (whether it turns into a romance, drama, tragedy or romantic comedy, I leave it to you.. and them ;D)

Hey guys

Ambitions, Ambitions, Ambitions

When I grow up, I want to be... ...bigger .o.

Long long ago, in a galaxy far far away, some emo kid had his hand chopped off by his cyborg father. And then someone dubbed that epic event in hokkien and we laughed and laughed ^o^

...in other news v_v;

Today Yesterday, certain events happened in a way that forced made me to think of what I want to do with my life. I'm looking for a job now, while I still have to complete my Masters' thesis. Things are lining up so that I have this impression that I should really chose which path I want to follow, set my priorities and all that kinda shit.

But of course, what I should do is just get my Masters done and over with and worry about everything else later v_v after all, even if I do decide on a career path, who's to say that I won't change my mind in the near future, or circumstances will open (or close) certain paths? like me suddenly becoming super good at starcraft or magic and becoming a PRO GAMER WOO HOO *o*

..dreams are good, you know. They set goals and motivate us to do things in life. That's why I admire people with ambitions, no matter what their ambitions are. The act of having an ambition or passion towards something is more important than the validity of the ambition itself ^_~ the journey is much more important and meaningful than the destination~

So because I have no idea how to end this post and I wanted to, here's a list of my previous-to-current ambitions (that I can remember and/or are not too ashamed to admit) ^o^

Amateur God needing help T_T

I have this idea of an awesome vampire story that already has a juicy mechanic and overarching storyline, but I can't get started on it at all because I'm stuck with the setting >_<

You see, I want to create a world where there is no such thing as a sun or sunlight.

I've gone through tons of ideas to no avail.. starting from disregarding everything and treating it as a magical world where the conditions are suitable for life to exist even without a life-giving celestial body (since everything would freeze without the warmth of the sun, not to mention the lack of oxygen thanks to zero photosynthesis, which relies on primarily sun power)

Then I moved to a super outlandish idea that 'solved' the problem with the existence of oxygen by putting a huge ass ancient electrolysis machine at the bottom of that world's ocean (believe me, the super crazy back story I created surprisingly makes sense *_* I don't wanna spoil it yet though). This also allowed the fauna of that world's ocean to be really unique - most of them would evolved to cooperate electricity in their bodies, like eels do in our world~ and it also makes the oceans of that world extra dangerous thanks to them being electrically charged *O*

With oxygen solved, I realized that the world would still be colder than a freezer, even with oxygen.. and this is one of my biggest problems thus far. Our main source of heat is from the sun, and without a sun, (or even far enough away from a star) a planet would be freezing to human standards. I toyed with the idea that the heat comes from the ground itself, where the planet has a lot more tectonic and volcanic activity.. but I doubt that'd be enough, really T_T This is where I could use the most help.

Of course, without a sun anywhere near the planet, it would be unbelievably dark. So what I came up was to have auroras periodically streaming across the sky, providing an eerie lighting for the setting. Auroras are usually caused by the collision of charged particles directed by the Earth's magnetic field, which would seem like it makes sense to have them on my world since the there would be some funky magnetic fieldwork thanks to the electronic bzzt bzzt of the world's oceans.

Another aspect that relies on the sun is the planet's orbit, which usually circles around the sun thanks to it being pulled by the sun's gravity. A planet without a sun would then spiral out of control and float freely in outer space. While this might sound like the Death Star, that thing is a freaking spaceship and has its own propulsion system. A planet without an orbit would more likely crash into something than float happily around in space.

How I solved this was to come up with yet another crazy idea; I put the planet between three black holes. While black holes compress everything into their center, being in between three black holes allows the planet to spin around almost indefinitely in the center where their gravitational pull intercepts. Whenever the planet almost gets sucked into one black hole's gravitational field, the opposing two black holes pull it free and the cycle repeats ad nauseam.(By the way, being 'close' to a black hole isn't close at all - the planet is lightyears away from each of the three black holes - even further than our solar system's width @o@)

And.. yeah, that's about it. My attempt to make a working planetary system with my very very very very limited knowledge of astrophysics and ecology :P Hopefully someone would come up and point up what I'm doing wrong, as I really want to get this right XP The idea is so awesome, but I need more knowledge to make it work T_T;