Ambitions, Ambitions, Ambitions

When I grow up, I want to be... ...bigger .o.

Long long ago, in a galaxy far far away, some emo kid had his hand chopped off by his cyborg father. And then someone dubbed that epic event in hokkien and we laughed and laughed ^o^

...in other news v_v;

Today Yesterday, certain events happened in a way that forced made me to think of what I want to do with my life. I'm looking for a job now, while I still have to complete my Masters' thesis. Things are lining up so that I have this impression that I should really chose which path I want to follow, set my priorities and all that kinda shit.

But of course, what I should do is just get my Masters done and over with and worry about everything else later v_v after all, even if I do decide on a career path, who's to say that I won't change my mind in the near future, or circumstances will open (or close) certain paths? like me suddenly becoming super good at starcraft or magic and becoming a PRO GAMER WOO HOO *o*

..dreams are good, you know. They set goals and motivate us to do things in life. That's why I admire people with ambitions, no matter what their ambitions are. The act of having an ambition or passion towards something is more important than the validity of the ambition itself ^_~ the journey is much more important and meaningful than the destination~

So because I have no idea how to end this post and I wanted to, here's a list of my previous-to-current ambitions (that I can remember and/or are not too ashamed to admit) ^o^

Amateur God needing help T_T

I have this idea of an awesome vampire story that already has a juicy mechanic and overarching storyline, but I can't get started on it at all because I'm stuck with the setting >_<

You see, I want to create a world where there is no such thing as a sun or sunlight.

I've gone through tons of ideas to no avail.. starting from disregarding everything and treating it as a magical world where the conditions are suitable for life to exist even without a life-giving celestial body (since everything would freeze without the warmth of the sun, not to mention the lack of oxygen thanks to zero photosynthesis, which relies on primarily sun power)

Then I moved to a super outlandish idea that 'solved' the problem with the existence of oxygen by putting a huge ass ancient electrolysis machine at the bottom of that world's ocean (believe me, the super crazy back story I created surprisingly makes sense *_* I don't wanna spoil it yet though). This also allowed the fauna of that world's ocean to be really unique - most of them would evolved to cooperate electricity in their bodies, like eels do in our world~ and it also makes the oceans of that world extra dangerous thanks to them being electrically charged *O*

With oxygen solved, I realized that the world would still be colder than a freezer, even with oxygen.. and this is one of my biggest problems thus far. Our main source of heat is from the sun, and without a sun, (or even far enough away from a star) a planet would be freezing to human standards. I toyed with the idea that the heat comes from the ground itself, where the planet has a lot more tectonic and volcanic activity.. but I doubt that'd be enough, really T_T This is where I could use the most help.

Of course, without a sun anywhere near the planet, it would be unbelievably dark. So what I came up was to have auroras periodically streaming across the sky, providing an eerie lighting for the setting. Auroras are usually caused by the collision of charged particles directed by the Earth's magnetic field, which would seem like it makes sense to have them on my world since the there would be some funky magnetic fieldwork thanks to the electronic bzzt bzzt of the world's oceans.

Another aspect that relies on the sun is the planet's orbit, which usually circles around the sun thanks to it being pulled by the sun's gravity. A planet without a sun would then spiral out of control and float freely in outer space. While this might sound like the Death Star, that thing is a freaking spaceship and has its own propulsion system. A planet without an orbit would more likely crash into something than float happily around in space.

How I solved this was to come up with yet another crazy idea; I put the planet between three black holes. While black holes compress everything into their center, being in between three black holes allows the planet to spin around almost indefinitely in the center where their gravitational pull intercepts. Whenever the planet almost gets sucked into one black hole's gravitational field, the opposing two black holes pull it free and the cycle repeats ad nauseam.(By the way, being 'close' to a black hole isn't close at all - the planet is lightyears away from each of the three black holes - even further than our solar system's width @o@)

And.. yeah, that's about it. My attempt to make a working planetary system with my very very very very limited knowledge of astrophysics and ecology :P Hopefully someone would come up and point up what I'm doing wrong, as I really want to get this right XP The idea is so awesome, but I need more knowledge to make it work T_T;

The most romantic Monday of the year

Today Yesterday was the most romantic Monday of the year for most people~ I'm always so amused at how people react to this day every year *_* 

The singles burst in outrage saying that its just another day, or band together in self pity, calling it Singles Awareness Day or something to that effect.. XD 

The doubles on the other hand don't say anything (in fear of being bricked to death by jealous peers? XD) but go out of their way to display their affection to the world~ *o*

I have nothing against the tradition of Valentine's day, after all, it's just a tradition that reminds us to love each other <3

What I do have a problem with is how certain parties take advantage of this tradition. You know the symptoms, raised chocolate prices, extremely expensive Valentine's themed food sets, overpriced flowers, all this and more~

Speaking of flowers, I'm one of the types of people that dislikes the idea of flowers. For one, they've never appealed to me. Are they really beautiful? To be more practical, flowers can never last for long (plus I'm too lazy to maintain them ;_;) Wilting flowers are one of the saddest images one can see, not to mention the pain of throwing them away and remembering how much was spent on them T_T

Its sad how society has capitalized an innocent day like Valentine's day into a commercialized money making holiday :\ 

Posting for the sake of posting

Many of the successful people that I really respect have one thing in common; they all are highly talented at whatever they specialize in because they have put their lives into it. 

There are a lot of talented people in the world, but the ones that I respect the most are people who I know started small, they started as nobodies, just like me, and became what they are today through sheer persistence. Practice makes perfect, and these people are living, breathing examples of how this is true.

A lot of people that I know are often stumped by the great wall that stands in their way of improving themselves, and many give up their dreams because its so difficult to cross over the seemingly thin line from good to great, myself included.

In fact, that line is so universally difficult to cross that there is even a mentality that has evolved from ignoring it completely, settling for the mediocrity of merely being 'good' at things without excelling at anything in particular. This is the 'jack-of-all-trades' mentality, something that I aspired to be when I was younger.

Being my ambition, I eventually succeeded in becoming a jack-of-all-trades not too long ago, being marginally good at almost anything, always able to perform averagely in any situation and never ending up last in anything, and consequently not being the best at anything. 

Life experiences so far has thought me that this is a very mediocre state to be in and I'd not rather excel at a few things and suck at everything else than be ok at everything but not up to standard for anything. While I never get the shame of coming in last or being at the center of attention for all the wrong reasons, I always envy those select few who are so unbelievably good at what they do.

How do I become like them? How do I cross from merely good to great? Like I mentioned earlier, it all comes back to sheer persistence. Do anything, and I mean anything for long enough, and you'll bound to get better at it. "Practice makes perfect." "Big shots are only little shots who keep shooting."

This is so basic and so true that it's almost common sense, but at the same time it seems so stupid that it makes most people react by doubting it, saying "nah, can't be that easy, there must be something extra" after all, even Albert Einstien thinks that its a crazy idea. 

"Insanity: Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results."

The Parent

The parent, like the moniker suggests, is a friend that often reminds us of our parents. In both good and bad ways. Its nice to have a caring friend that we can rely on, but at the same time, another person nagging us to do something 'for our own good' is never fun ^^;

A common characteristic of the parent is to be extraordinary caring. The parent usually worries about our well being and constantly goes out of their way to ensure that we're comfortable, safe, and happy at all times. In addition to that, they often advise us when we face problems and give us guidance. Most people are very thankful to have the parent as a friend, and oftentimes feel very secure with such a person.

However, the parent is one of the most difficult character to get into a relationship with, which is surprising considering the fact that a caring personality is a desirable characteristic. There really isn't a problem with the parent (aside from the risk of becoming overbearing like a protective parent), the thing is, it is more of a matter of difference in point of view, there is a different level of respect.

Oftentimes, the parent sees their closest friends as someone to be protected, 'don't worry, I have you under my wing~' they boldly claim. While this is honorable and all, such a mindset gets in the way of having mutual respect. I'm not saying that the parent looks down on all their friends, but they often succumb to assuming that they have to take the leading position and might sometimes impose themselves on others, trampling their peer's wishes even though they have good intentions.

In the same vein, we also tend to look at the parent on a different level. Due to their guidance and security they provide to us, we often look up to the parent and treat them with a certain level of respect. Again, while this is a good thing, it might create a barrier between us and the parent, making us unable to act naturally or be talk freely around them - and anytime we have to control your behavior around someone, we can never be completely comfortable or at ease.

What's important, then, is to achieve a sense of mutual respect. Then we can have a healthy relationship with  these noble characters who give us much needed sense of security, especially away from our families~ and who knows, with mutual respect, you might be able to return the deed to them as well! Many times, (but not all!) relationships with the parent often end up becoming very close knit, but erring more towards siblings or parents (for lack of a better term) ..or like a member of an extended family :)

Visual Dreams

I've often heard lots of negative criticisms towards a lot of 'singer's nowadays, and the truth is, I think such criticisms are undeserved because the majority of them are not really 'singer's, but are actually idols.

Kim TaeYeon - the most adorable
and lovable girl ever~ >w<♥♥
*biased biased biased biased*

What is an idol? An idol is basically a new breed of performer and/or entertainer. This concept has become pretty mainstream in asian countries such as Japan and Korea, but not very well known in other parts of the world. This is a problem, because idols are not necessarily products of asian pop culture, but rather modern culture in general. I believe the idol evolved from the existence of video based entertainment such as music videos and television programs such as talk shows, variety shows, and reality shows.

The main characteristic of an idol is near-perfect features. And idol must be appealing to the eyes thanks to its visual based nature. You can't be an idol unless your looks appeal to at least a genre of fans. Looks aside, idols also specialize in other skills such as singing, dancing, acting, talking or hosting shows. Nevertheless, the highlight of an idol is almost always their beautiful, cute, cool, and/or amazing good looks. If they happen to be especially talented in anything else, that's just the icing on the cake.

It is this focus on good looks that subjects these idols to malicious comments such as they cant sing, have no talent, and rely solely on their looks to attract people. These are not only singers or actors or what have you, but sadly, most of them are characterized under 'singers','musicians', 'actors' or some other kind of performing title when in truth, they are idols.

I think the classification of 'idol' should be given more recognition. The main thing standing in its way, though, is the fact that it is not a good thing to admit that you like someone for their looks, it's too materialistic, too judge-a-book-by-its-cover. Such behavior automatically puts you into the same classification as shallow, materialistic, playboy/girls. But come on, who doesn't like to look at good looking people? To me, it sounds a lot like denial in the face of society's rules and peer pressure.

Justin Bieber - revered as a god in certain cultures -_-b

This mentality also stands in the way of certain performers wanting to accept the classification of an 'idol', it sounds way too much like admitting to the world that 'I'm a dumb blond durrr ^-^'. That statement isn't really true, though. The ability to be good looking is just as difficult as being able to be good at singing. Idols devote basically their entire lifestyles to maintaining their good looks, not to mention that attitude and characteristics are also very important contributors to being good looking - something they must watch what they do all the time in order to keep up a certain image.

While this is true for all types of performers and entertainers in our modern world, these are especially important issues for an idol, and to the people that think that these idols are 'fake' and are not naturally that beautiful on the outside and on the inside, the ability to keep up that image 24/7 is not an easy feat at all. I like to liken doing this to working as an actor that constantly have to be in character all the time for a movie that will never end until their career does.

The Beatles - don't judge.
chances are that your mom
thought they were hawt XP

I'm not saying that I defend people who are fake or think that looks are the most important things in the world, what I'm saying is that these acts are sadly misunderstood by most people and are automatically tacked with negative associations all the time that it's sad. To me, such things still require effort, and if such idols really are fakers, I still admire them for the effort they put into transforming themselves from bitches into angels on camera. Not many people can do that, and I think that kind of skill is just as admirable as other skills such as singing or acting prowess (in fact, its an evolved form of acting anyway).

The world is full of idols now~ in fact, idols have been around for centuries, beginning from the first performers to use music videos such as The Beatles, countless boy bands, girl bands, and one of the most popular idols in the world today - Justin Bieber.

Of course, all of this is just my attempt to justify the fact that I'm a crazy huge fanboy of SNSD XD and an excuse to put TaeYeon's picture on my blog (again) ;w;  kyaa~♥ lol XP

Why are the audios for my videos unaligned?!

Once upon a time, there was a girl which spent most of her waking hours hiding behind the thick rims of her emo-kid glasses.

These emo-kid glasses spent most of their lives in front of monitors. When our hero is asleep, they rest in front of her computer monitor. She puts them on and checks her reflection in the darkened monitor when she wakes up in the morning, she also spends most of her time in front of a monitor - watching dramas, playing games, socializing, you name it. She even faces monitors all the time during work!

This girl spends lots of her time typing up press releases for her boss, which is coincidentally also her monitor back in high school. Which was also her only friend in high school, because they originated from a school where only the smartest kids of their neighborhood went, which was filled with people who don't really socialize. Her monitor was her only friend not only because he's a friendly guy with rounded features all around (fatfat ^o^), they go waay back; he was her monitor forever, back in primary school and even kindergarten!

In fact, Mr. Monitor lives next door, and walks with her to school every single day. Every. Single. Day. These emo-kid glasses have monitors imprinted on them. The toothbrush often joke that her glasses are cursed to face monitors forever, reflecting the reflections of their reflections off the reflections to infinity.. the sad paradox that happens whenever two reflective surfaces meet, which is the infinite loop that our hero's glasses are indefinitely trapped in.

Anyways, the interesting thing about our hero is that she often faces a very frustrating problem when watching shows, especially her favorite dramas. The audio for the videos are always, always, unaligned. They appear half a second faster than the video, so you hear the scream before the girl's mouth opens, and you hear the laugh before the slapstick action is even done with.

Infinitely frustrating, I know. She tried everything, fixing the video files, using a different software, nothing. There was no way for her to fix it. So she lived with it and tolerated it.

Until one day, when she watched television. It was the first time she watched television since she could remember, since televisions went obsolete thanks to the invention of the internet. It was then that our hero discovered something that chilled her to the rims of her thick glasses.

The audio was unaligned for the television show as well! @O@

Panicked, she ran to her grandfather that owned the television, hoping that he also owned a plausible answer to her predicament, and then she realized...

...the audio for her grandfather was unaligned too! @O@O@O@O@O@

All of the sudden, it hit her, everything's audio was unaligned to her - the tick-tock of the clock, the thud that came before the door closed, everything. Scary!

Until she realized that... hey, wait a minute, she can hear half a second into the future! Wow, she can tell the future!! ...half a second into the future, where even if she can fore-hear a car crashing into her, the only thing she could do was to yell "AAAAA STO-" half a second faster, perhaps being able to finishing pronouncing the word 'stop'.

And so, that's how our hero realized that she owned a superpower, though she could not follow the footsteps of others that had superpowers before her and save the world or make it a better place - because she had a useless superpower, a suberpower v__v